Fan:Sterling Archer
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Sterling Archer is one of the team pack characters in LEGO Dimensions, he is playable when you purchase the LEGO Dimensions Archer Team Pack.
Background
Malory Archer, Sterling's mother, speculates that Sterling was conceived shortly before she participated in Operation Gladio. The list of Archer's possible fathers include Nikolai Jakov, Len Trexler, and Buddy Rich, as well as an unnamed young Italian man who was gunned down in the streets of Italy and had "blue eyes, full lips, and thick wavy hair". Sterling Malory Archer was born in Reggie's Bar in Tangiers, in northern Morocco, Africa, when his mother, Malory Archer, was birthed by Woodhouse. Woodhouse handed Malory a rattle made of sterling silver for the baby. Malory liked the name Sterling, and decided to name him that. Woodhouse suggested that his middle name be "Reginald", after Captain Reginald Thistleton (a deceased friend of Woodhouse's that served in World War I, with whom Woodhouse may or may not have been infatuated), but Malory decided that Reginald sounded "too gay", instead naming him after herself. Malory offered Woodhouse the job of taking care of Archer. Woodhouse traded his bar for a boat, sailed Malory and Sterling to Lisbon, got Malory to an OSS safe house, sold the boat, and used the money to take Sterling back to the U.S. Sterling spent the first five years of his life being raised by Woodhouse and only seeing his mother a few times per year, such as on Christmas. This made him have an extremely negative view of his mother as a young child. It got to the point that when she came home he stated he had no mother and said he hated her. When Archer was four years old, Archer's "father", John Fitzgerald Archer, was "killed" in action. Malory upheld this lie so far as to hold a military funeral for him. At some point as a child, Malory moved without telling Archer's boarding school, leading to him to take a train home alone and eventually ending up in a police station. Malory had to pick him up and continues to view the situation as not her fault, stating that he could have picked up a phonebook. Archer celebrated his sixth birthday while his mother assisted in overthrowing the government of Guatemala (in reality, the CIA overthrew Guatemala's government over June 18-27, 1954). Unbeknownst to Malory, he man who was Sterling's father visited him and gave him a stuffed toy alligator as a gift since at that time he loved them. This love would at some point become a chronic fear. One year on Halloween, Archer lost a card game to Malory, losing all of his Halloween candy. This incident caused Archer to have an extremely negative view on gambling for many years to come. It is also implied that this incident is the first time he drank alcohol. One year, Archer got a brand new bike for his birthday. However, Archer left his bike on the curb. Malory took it from him without giving it back. When Archer discovered that his bike was missing, he sat crying on his bed. Malory walked in and asked where his new bike was. Archer simply cried harder, and Malory spanked him with a red ping-pong paddle.
One day, Archer decided to use a vacuum to simulate the experience of receiving a blowjob. However, the vacuum did a number on Archer's balls. Woodhouse called an ambulance while hiding the vacuum from both Malory and the doctor, who both went out together while Woodhouse waited for the ambulance to take Archer to the hospital. Archer lost his virginity at age 12 to his female Brazilian au pair, who was seemingly unaware of the American age of consent. At his tenth grade sports banquet, Archer was caught having sex with his coach, Mrs. Mupherd. Malory considers this to be the most embarrassing thing Archer has ever done. Archer states that she came onto him and so it was not his fault. During his freshman year, Archer was given a swirly by Richard Stratton IV and Trent Whitney in a toilet that Whitney had pissed in. Archer spent five weeks in the hospital; he had aspirated water in his lungs, and gotten pneumonia from it. This incident caused him to miss out on varsity lacrosse his freshman year at St. Joshua's Prep. He spent up to 15 years at boarding school, despite American schooling taking 13 years. His hobby was lacrosse and flashbacks have indicated he had few to no friends. At age 18, he was regarded as the most recruited lacrosse player in America, although an incident with a crazed stalker gut-shooting him cost him both his lacrosse career and a possible scholarship to Johns Hopkins University (although it is implied this would not have happened anyway because of his poor SAT scores). A picture of Archer shows him graduating from Georgetown University, implying he is at least smart enough to receive a bachelor's degree in an unknown major (although according to his mother, he flunked out of college). As a child, Archer idolized Burt Reynolds, often dressing up as him and continually watching his movies. Upon growing up, Archer attempted to join the army, but failed. Instead, he began work as a spy at his mother's agency, ISIS, quickly climbing the ranks as their top spy thanks to both his genuine skill and his mother's preferential treatment. Archer has the less than masculine code name of "Duchess" (taken from his mother's beloved Afghan hound, though Malory denies this) and had an on-again, off-again relationship with fellow agent Lana Kane for several years, which makes their working environment tenuous and difficult. Archer developed a genuine friendship with Lucas Troy (who unknowingly was in love with Archer) but they broke off their friendship when Troy quit to work for ODIN. Troy secretly anally raped Archer while on a mission to tap a Cuban embassy. This would not come to light until Luke's deathbed confession many years later. It is unknown if the rest of the group is aware of this. When he was 30, Archer wanted a toy truck which Malory wouldn't let him have.
Notes
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